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Friday, August 26, 2011

Plans are Made for Breaking, Right?

Well, today was supposed to be day 2 of our official preschool work. But, baby girl went to bed, last night, stuffy nosed, with a bit of a cough. The stuffy nose was upsettign her so much, and I couldn't figure out how to help her, really.  It made me feel so inadequate as a Mommy. But, with just 2 wake ups for a little comfort before I went to bed, and one at 4:00 am, it really was an easier night than I expected.  Unfortunately, she woke with a bit of a fever.  Not enough to call the doctor, but enought hat I knew we had to lay low.  Her voice sounds so weak...poor thing.  But, her energy level, though quieter, was still pretty healthy all day.  In spite of that, I decided to not do school, today. Ah, well. We're not in any competition or race. Next week is a quieter week in general, so we'll maybe do a little more, throughout.

So, a question for fellow homeschoolers...when you were making your decision to homeschool, or maybe when you were having to defend your decision, or maybe you still do this - Did you make little lists in your head of things that a person experiences in regular school that he or she won't necessarily experience in homeschool, and you can't think of a time in grown-up life where that experience from regular school ever presented itself again?  (Okay, was that a confusing question?)  I do, at times.  I guess because I think through things I don't want my girl to miss out on....and I think of the things I hope she never has to go through.
This is today's thought.  When, once you're finished with school and are in the working world, do you ever have to sit or stand on the sidelines, hoping you won't be picked last for a team? 
It's not something I have thought of for many years, really, but that thought popped in my head, today, and I remember all the times, in elementary school PE, waiting and waiting to be picked for kickball teams.  I wore glasses, and I'm sure I was quite awkward and dorky.  Being picked close to last, if not last, was a fact of my young life.  And it was AWFUL!!  So, then I asked myself, once I was grown and out on my own in the working world, did I ever have to experience that again?
The answer was - NO!  BUT....I also realized that I probably held myself back from trying new things, because I figured no one would think I was good enough.  For a couple of seasons, I was the "coach" of our co-ed softball team at work. Not because I played, but because I could keep score, and make a line up.  And, the players wanted a team, but no one wanted to coach. So I did it.  But, with my love of baseball, no one understood why I wouldn't play, too.  I always just figured I wasn't good enough, though I never, ever tried.  If I hadn't been one of those kids who was always picked last (or close to) for sports in elementary school, would I have been so reluctant to play softball?  I wonder.....
So, I'm thinking (hoping) one thing my girl may not have to experience, if we're able to homeschool all the years of school, is the constant humiliation and tearing down of any self confidence that comes with being picked last. 
Of course, I think she's amazing, and just can't picture her being one of the dorky, picked last kids.  But, still....the idea of that not even being a possibility, because of our choice to homeschool, gives me a little sense of relief for her.

'Til Later!

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